(836)
“The million year guest”
I lived in the Sinai for a million years,
waking every morning in Gods country,
checking first thing from the door of my home sky
sea
and the vast flatlands demarcated by mountains
red orange in early morning sun
cold
and frosty on the sand, rough, a snow of rock
sandy silt rock orange to the camels coat
he who stands perfectly unmoving and disappears to the eye
in one heart beat within that unchanging land.
I
lived in the Sinai for a million years
a
guest to dunes and a sea that followed
so much like a woman her cycles with the moon:
Lived perched half in half out a solid mound stretched canvass
palm branches
architecturally sounded by a mind imported in from far
flown
in from another planet
(but still so much in love with life) that
this land
with the love of a she creature in heat
lay at my feet one morning and offered me
as
her gift of spring a flower,
one flower,
a flower blooming there…..
blossoming perfect white, her inner self opened for one day
to
the powder blue of my cloudless Sinai sky,
not to
far
from
the same sea
that
yesterday in grace made way for a whole people
busy in flight and in search
for a
life new in promise.
In
silence I could hear them still
as they
as one and me with them could open our arms to say
its now
for us to know
to
weave that tapestry rich
with
life’s imageries
rich with those
inner wisdoms
and
songs we will have at journeys end to offer to our children
as the
sun comes up again to light in time eternal
our rocky mountains that still
so secret
promise
every day new revelations
to
you
to me
to the
image of long legged white birds running
unconcerned on the receding shine of our waters edge.
.
(835)
“ Mirrored ”
Some men just
LOOOVE to hold court
and you will see them in position
or fighting for position or
crying
the positions they held……
Casually
walk around one of these people
a
full one eighty
degrees back to start
to ascertain
the
dimensions they reveal………
It might not be surprising
to find them to vanish
at angles oblique to
ones light,
when lines of sight
lose hold of mesmerism’s
and you can claim
yourself then
to be standing alone.
(834)
“Enjoyment”
I enjoy standing
at the
fronting table
for books
being sold on a Yeoville street.
Christ and you. The power of prayer.
How to answer your children’s questions in Christ’s name.
Those are the only
books sold there plus others
of
the same vein….
It’s a saints pit
stop I notice,
haloes blaze on as
they pull in to gaze
with
reverent eyes at those titles,
backs straighten and
shoulders pull back
as one tome after another is
lifted
to be
randomly opened to any page, and words
are critically acclaimed
with recognized exclamations
of appreciation to the salesman that
happy
to pay heed
smiles on as he acknowledges those egos
that
for five minutes
enjoy in innocence the pleasure of being “good”…….
.
(833)
“ The laughter of a man
sitting down ”
The laughter of a man
that laughs
sitting
down;
alone……. while doing nothing …..
conjures theater of mind.
Not
YOUR theater to YOUR mind but……..
his to YOURS !!!
*
Your theater
is
guessing at his thought.
And
maybe you are laughing
at
what you THINK he’s thinking.
Or
being disgusted
at what you THINK his vulgarities are…
(832)
“ Agh Noit !!! ”
The smell
of
a cat messing about
in its sand box
leaves NOTHING
to
imagination …..
(831)
“The truth of belief”
The truth of belief
must go uncontested.
How to define without belief
all we know, all we love and don’t ?
*
How to unite dream
with reality without belief ?…..
We need
belief in our life
long enough at least to give us
the steering powers
necessary to drive
our cars
past cliffs and to keep ourselves on the road
…..
*
But know
that
truth and belief is only
an
issue of false relief if you want to think that they
are one and the same.
*
Do not
go looking for truth
in
amongst beliefs, do not hope
for something solid to stand on
there
to give solace if something solid is what you need.
*
Truth is Gods domain, as
nothing exists separate
from the other and the picture
is so vast
no human eye can be wide
enough to see..
*
Allow
truth to be out there in its magnificence
recognized to its glory, something we can strive to be a part of
if we want,
but know that to live in truth
is to access something beyond all definition a state
of being
that in description becomes belief,
greatly lesser
than the
sum of its parts.
*
Belief is a
shadow.
*
Truth and
belief are NOT one
and the same……
and to confuse the one with the other
is to dine on chalk and not cheese.
(829)
“ Easter’s good news ”
The Easter time
road death toll
is down 24% over
last year they say.
Oh goody goody good …… !!!
There have been 54
less
incidents
of death less this year
over
the year
last.
Oh goody goody goody!
Do I hear
(if I
listen carefully) the sound
from far off of some back slapping
from some back room high up
somewhere
….. ?
Of a job
well done…? And NOW (I think I hear them say)
that look we can deliver,
we are delivering,
we can now
shut the press up now
with
news of good news !!!
Oh goody goody GOODY !!!!
***
What I do NOT
hear…………
……………..is they do not seem to realize that……………………………….
…………………………….NONE of those dead………………
…………………………will rise again !!! ……………..
now
,
WHAT a pity that !!!
(828)
“When a detour becomes the main road”
Easy
to push jealousy to its death
(( if you know jealousy is not
the way ))
by the murder of ones loving.
No love, no jealousy.
Simple.
***
You can be above it all when
you don’t
(if you don’t)
allow the bloom of love
to
take hold,
to change the rules,
to
change your world,
to challenge you in to growing.
*On the other hand…*
Easy
to stay jealous
if jealousy is all you know of love,
it tastes
delicious in its deliverance,
rewarding in its validation,
safe with the strength of mountains
comforting
with the pain of love
-“ I am jealous
and therefore I love”-
***
You can be above
it all when
you
allow jealousy its hold.
*
You can put blame were you want
and how you want if you want.
And if change
is to take place …………………..
Well………………………………
It will have be in the other camp (don’t you think ???)
(827)
“ Never say never ”
I can be as cagey as you,
I
can be as brief as you,
I can be as evasive if necessary
without ever resorting to lies just like you,
just as
honest,
but like you I am a cauldron
of everything unsaid beneath,
like me you are the same,
dreams mixing with hope n’dream
and passion and interests and loves and
aspirations and
inspirations and contradicting visions
tied up in disappointment resentment and anger, a fisherman’s net
heavy with treasure and refuse, star fish and tin cans
woven in with
understood responsibilities, woven with cleaver knots to and with
misunderstood priorities,
with
crystallized (or just self
serving at times) opinions
used as high up landmark flags
to
keep ones bearings focused
in an otherwise
to unsettled
to behold
setting……
Absolutes like “never” –
“always”-“ are built
as
high and strong as castle walls at times
to surround and protect all
that
is treasured and dear…..
Like ones sanity….. or treasured
dreams.
Or ones family …….
Or
culture ……..
unfortunately at times
the walls are so high
not even birds or the sun can get
in and
that
is why I say to
me and to you
to
remember windows, remember windows. Don’t
close
your eyes
on to the world
(826) -1
“ Memories ”
Memories,
shards of a pot
pieced together with skill
or not, with
a glue made up mostly of need
and desire,
a need to
to see back an original shape
that once so familiar
lays now in fragments,
crushed by
overlapping
events,
use,
and
time ……………………..
To remember
is a request to
see beyond what eye can see,
in to a space of colored threads
that blown
by draft of
celestial winds reach in to the deepest black
of
outer-inner spaces,
undulating
root or squid like tendrils
sensitized
to retrieve on
to itself
shapes that
floating by, re-awaken the possible feel of vision.
As fragments
they serve to confirm
(same as
souvenirs do)
that yes you have been to
that every Purim
are lifted down from off your wall)
and that yes,
you did have a baby ( those absurdly small sox confirm it,
the
sox you never had the heart to throw away)
and who
is that adult man
that comes
visiting now
on occasion,
did he actually wear these sox at one time?
Those are memories
that still connected to a time
of conscious
decision making tomes that speak volumes still float
vaguely close to the minds surface
of YOUR collecting self .
(826) -2
Deeper and deeper one
can go
in to another realm ,
in to a passenger
time
of vaguely
knowing again
what’s
it like to be pushed in a pram
or ride somebody’s back
wrapped in a woolen blanket
or
what it was like to sit in a sandbox wondering at that wide space above
as hands close the
front of your coat….
and there are
voices……
that demand ……..
you
…….
blow
your nose in to a tissue that’s being pressed
against your face……..
when
somebody’s tone of voice was more
than half the message.
What shape does
the pot have now , what is missing, and does it hold water?
What do you use
to replace all that is missing
and
from were did you harvest all you
appropriated
back
to this time ?
Back and forth
across a life, tourists cruise the
continent
of
past lovers, children raised , friends had …
marriages and deaths
diplomas earned , cities lived in
all points
that
wile
seeking moment
landmark
back to us
our other side of our visible
moon …
(823)
“ Simple ”
Without saying a word we all
know
what I am talking about here
If it works
take credit
then FIX it
fix it, and when it falls apart
talk of strategies
talk of committees
talk of strategies
talk
of feasibilities
case studies
then
as the system disintegrates
place blame,
point fingers
and replace
all that is
faulty with component
that
get operated only
by way of strings pulled straight
from the top.
(822)
“Honesty”
-“You
are a turn on”-
-“(That’s NOT what I want to hear)”-
!!!
-“But
that is what I feel”-
-“(That’s NOT what I want to hear)”-
!!!
-“But
its TRUE !!!”-
-“(That’s NOT what I want
to hear)”- !!!
-“Then
WHAT do you want to hear ?”-
-“anything but that …….
I have had to much of that……
I like it if I feel the same: But if I don’t….. its
to heavy a brick
on the
floor
on the wrong side
of
my door.”-
( ……………… !!!) (?)
(821)
“When hands wash each other”
Thank you
I heard a man
ask a woman
if she can become his eyes
( because he is blind,)
*
He asked her to be his eyes
wile I was sitting
on a couch
next to a lady with her little son .
(We were watching a movie being…..,
being
projected
on to a big white wall
about a blind man
that asked a
woman to be his eyes)…..
***
I knew
without doubt whatsoever
that at times I was seeing what I saw
with the eyes of the
lady I was sitting with on the couch.
I was seeing the movie through
what
her eyes saw, and her way too…..
(like when we were looking projections of
a waters’s
surface
seen from underneath
(all its shimmering’s of blue light
reflected in eucalyptus
tree bark like shapes back down to us from the top.)
*
I
herd her murmur quiet to herself
in organic empathy to
that
sight………..
and I felt new moisture dew over with new waters my sands .
*
I felt a rains gentle drizzle
visit a land that has been a desert for to long,
abandoned
in blindness ,in hurt, isolated from Gods play.
*
I saw her eyes open flowers for
me
along the path,
another Moses bringing life back with only a touch
to my wasteland
rich in the promise of potential green ….
*
I am sure
that I can be excused
if when asked about the movie from a critics point of view
I can only give a possible overview
of implications and story line
as my eyes were taken mostly by her sight
and my heart too, taken by her…
and the slight weight of her son, a weight shared
through the closed
heat of our laps ……
(819)
“ How to be kind ?”
People
that have
3 pack a day ego’s
just LOVE
to talk
about
their egos and how they are
in the
process of giving it
( their egos) up.
Lets talk about it
(they
say) as they explain what they are doing
to
accomplish this extraordinary
(and humble) feat.
No, I do NOT want
to talk
about
your ego my friend…
I do not care to
look in to your toilet when you finish.
What you flush
and how you flush it
is
your business but that don’t mean that
we
cannot talk about matters YOU !
(or
me)
or anything else really, as things go …
But to talk
about anything that obsessive
obsessively goes round
and round
and round the same centre
is like talking with a drunk
that
the next day
wont
remember a thing …
(796)
“ Changing gears ”
Your car is a great GREAT car.
It
will get you from A to B no problem.
It’s got a combustion
engine.
It will
create some pollution but we will not speak of that.
It will
take you from A to B.
As long as A to B is were you want to go you
it will
be fine.
But what if you want to go to C or Z?
Will a combustion
engine still be your answer?
What if
you have NEVER been to C
(and do not even know where C is)
and
do not know
that what lies between B and C
IS NOT THE SAME LANDSCAPE
as what you found between A and B ?
Combustion might NOT be your answer.
It might be
then
that
your car is NOT
such
a great GREAT car after all.
You might
need to create new systems.
You might need
to… INVENT.
You
might need to say that
yes, that to go from A to B it’s a great GREAT car
but you might have to admit
to
go from B to C or Z
something radically different might be needed,
and that
if you don’t
and
… that if
you
insist
on using
A to B systems NOBODY will be going then anywhere
at
all
and
in
fact
that
great GREAT car of yours might just then be wiped out
in
the
process.